On Breaking Up: Who Really Wins?

 

Relationships are not always rainbows and butterflies. Many Singaporeans are aware of this. In fact, others also believe that there is no such thing as forever love. No matter what you believe in, it is high time that you know who really wins when the couple is breaking up. There are many reasons for breaking up but the most common is infidelity or betrayal.

If you are a woman, you will feel worse especially if you know he is getting busy with Betty or Sarah while you are still in the relationship. Nothing is more painful than being betrayed. Women cope differently. Whether you indulge yourself to Ben & Jerry’s or you throw away his things, you have to know that you are still a winner in that relationship.

You may lose him but at the end of the day, you are the lucky one. As it turned out, science agreed that women who were cheated are the ones who win in the end. Supporting this claim is a study conducted by partners Binghamton University in New York and University College London. The title of the study is ‘Intrasexual Mate Competition and Breakups: Who Really Wins?’.

The study revealed that women who broke up with their partner because of infidelity or unfaithfulness end up the winner in the long run. Why? Women have better experience of adapting to break ups which can help them make better and informed choices in the future. The study included 5,705 respondents. The study concealed that after going through the usual feelings of anger, hatred, betrayal, bargaining, depression and stalking, the woman will emerge a better person at the end of the day.

The led researcher is Dr. Craig Morris and according to him, the woman who lost her mate to another woman will go through the usual stages of acceptance but the experience will give her a higher “mating intelligence”. Her intelligence in choosing a mate will be better which will allow her to notice cues that designate low mate value at the onset.

The losers in this story are really the man and the other woman. So if you find yourself in this situation, it is normal to feel grief at one point in time but remember that you are still a winner. Do not lament for a long time because you are just wasting your time. You will now know better with your “mating intelligence”. You can now spot early warning signs of cheating that way you will deal with heartache better.